I’m 35 and have been with my boyfriend a little over two years. He recently told me he is not and will not be ready for a family and marriage for at least two more years because he is having financial issues. I am ready now, or at least within the next year, and I want a future with him. I am scared to stay with him another two years just for him to again tell me he is not ready or maybe by then I’ll be too old to have kids. He has a lot of financial baggage and debt, I don’t. Should I move on or stick it out
6 comments:
Two years is an awful long time to stay with someone just to find out they don't share the same long term goals
A good man is a lot harder to find than a baby.....
If you can afford to support the child on your own, then that's your call, but the real problem is you still need a father or at least a "donor". I say don't have a baby with someone who's got financial problems because that child will only bear the brunt of all the money woes. I get your biological clock is ticking, but it won't be worth all the pain and misery you will suffer if you marry this guy and proceed to have a child with him.
This is interesting
LOL... While Ludwig has a good point I say, "Move on!" How is it that you can date a person, lay with a person and anything else you select to share with a person but when it's time to share matrimony "Uhhhhh 2 years. Let me get my check together" attitude pops up. NOT! Annndddd she's 3. Man whe'll be 37 and he'll say lets wait anoher two years. I would not waste anymore time.
In fact, I would begin to open up my options. If he means that much then keep him around but definitely don't be exclsuive to only him; when he's telling you in code, "I DON'T WANNA BE MARRIED WITH A FAMILY!!!" LOL
Temeka
When a man is ready he is ready. He might say two years and be ready in 6 months. or 5 years its a gamble and your choice if you wanna play.
I am sure like a billion other women out there, you had planned to have kids before you are 35 and that did not happen. It is usually our word against God's will.
From outside whe cannot see what goes on in your relationship. We can only speak from what we know and what you tell us. What you both want is very importand in a marraige and in raising children.
If you are going to share a life in the future, you might as well start now. He wnts to be able to provide for his family.
You might leave him for another man and a kid and
Personally, if I know is not a flaky guy and I feel deep down inside, he cares about me and wants to make it right, like any man would like to do. I will ask for Gods guide and offer to support him and find a common ground to what you both want.
If he declines, then take your chances on finding another loved one. Having kids should be inspired by love. Unless you do not mind being an unhappy wife or a single mom.
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